The Bachelor Party

DOYLE: So that's it then? That's your exciting plan for this geek? A book?
ANGEL: I get enough excitement.
DOYLE: Yeah of the evil-fighting variety. How about a little off-duty fun?
ANGEL: Such as?
DOYLE: Two beautiful words: Sports Bar!

DOYLE: Vampires have a nest downtown. Poor kid's gonna be the entree.
ANGEL: Let's go. Come on.
DOYLE: Everybody's got dinner plans but us.

ANGEL: Doyle, you're stronger when you're a demon, right? Why did you shake it off?
DOYLE: I just don't like to fight like that.
ANGEL: This isn't a spelling bee. Nobody expects you to play fair.
DOYLE: It's just not my style, that's all. Want me to go with?
ANGEL: I can handle it. Just head back.

DOYLE: (to Cordelia) Are you okay?
CORDELIA: I'm fine. That was... You were so - brave.
DOYLE: You think you could say that again without so much shock in your voice? You're stepping on my moment of manliness here.

HARRY: You're still living it up? You know that drinking's no good for you.
DOYLE: Well, you know me. I'm a fun-loving guy.

DOYLE: Hon bun?
HARRY: I didn't want you to hear it that way.
DOYLE: You're... You're marrying that guy?
HARRY: I know it's wild, huh? I'm definitely the Ying to his Yang, but it works! He's got a good heart, Francis, just like you.
DOYLE: Yeah, maybe, but the container, eh? Can I get a side of *bland* with that bland?
HARRY: I didn't come here for your approval.
DOYLE: Then why? To see my face when I found out? To see if it cut?
HARRY: Of course not. I would never... I just, (opens purse) I need you to sign these.
DOYLE: Divorce papers.
HARRY: It had to happen. I mean one of us...
DOYLE: Yeah, well, maybe I should get my people to look over these, before I go ahead. And, just to make sure I'm not buying an ostrich farm.

DOYLE: Harry is right. This does me no good.
ANGEL: So, you two hadn't been in touch at all since you split up?
DOYLE: Oh, the end was rough. We weren't even twenty when we got married. Crazy about each other. And when things go wrong and you're young like that, you don't just say 'Hey, thanks for the blender, I wish you well'. You fight. You tear each other apart until one of you can't take it. Oh, she did the walking. But she had reason. I wasn't exactly the man she married. I changed.
ANGEL: Oh, you shouldn't blame yourself for that. I mean, you were kids. It's only natural...
DOYLE: What, the sneeze and sprout demon face? That's decidedly *un*natural, my friend.
ANGEL: You didn't tell her before you got married?
DOYLE: I didn't know. I never met my dad. He was the demon. And my mom, well, she figured she'd wait to see if I'd got his genes before she got all confessional.
ANGEL: So your demon self didn't present...
DOYLE: Until I was 21, and Harry and I, were talking about having kids of our own. Huh, put a damper on the discussion, you can imagine.
ANGEL: That's tough. I'm sorry.
DOYLE: It's probably best in the long run. I'm too much of a wild man to be the stay-at-home type anyway, you know?

DOYLE: He's a demon? And she's all signed on to be Mrs. Demon? Tell me again how ugly he is!
ANGEL: (points to book) Here it is: Ano-movic. Once a nomadic tribe. At one point they did have violent leanings...
DOYLE: There! I knew that nice guy routine was just an act. He's working a spell on her. She gonna sprout hubcaps from her head or something.
ANGEL: (reading) But gave up those orthodox teachings, language, around the turn of the century. Now they own a number of restaurants with pretty expensive windows.
DOYLE: I fully intend to chip in on that. You know all that time Harry was going on about what an amazing thing my demon half could be, the worlds it opened up to us, I thought she was just trying to make me feel better. And that she was pitying me. But it was true. I just wasn't listening. You know, Harry didn't leave because of the demon in me - she left because of me.

RICHARD: Everybody, this party is for Doyle as much as it is for me, more even. He's the real bachelor here.
DOYLE: Yeah, and thanks for not rubbing that in, by the way.

DOYLE: Why don't I just give you that hug and we can call it even?
RICHARD: You're not trying to back out, are you? Not after you gave your blessing.
DOYLE: Yeah, yeah. I take it back!
RICHARD: Oh. Well. I see. Now I'm not so sure I even *want* to eat your brains!
DAD: Don't be petulant, Richard. You'll eat his brains. He can't take back a blessing. Now, apologize to your friend.
RICHARD: He's right. That, that, was rude. I'd be honoured to eat your brains.

CORDELIA: Hi, Doyle. Are you gonna become loser-pining guy, like, full-time now? 'Cos you know, we already have one of those around the office.
ANGEL: Hey!
DOYLE: Hey!
CORDELIA: He can get away with it. He's tall and, and, look at the way clothes hang on him. But you...
ANGEL: Okay, I think you've cheered us up enough.
CORDELIA: You can't live in the past. You gotta move on. Let it go. Forget it. Tomorrow is another day. Did I mention letting it go?
DOYLE: Twice.
CORDELIA: You'll get through this, Doyle. Nice guys don't always finish last.
DOYLE: You think I'm a nice guy?
CORDELIA: I think it, I say it. That's my way.
DOYLE: Thanks.
CORDELIA: Feeling better?
DOYLE: Yeah.